Voodoo against wicked neighbour recipe: How to transform him into an ugly woman.

Ingredients:
1 package beans
1 cabbage
1 teaspoon of bat powder
1 foul egg
1 stinking old fish
1 badly smelling shoe
1 black goat
1 dog costume

How to prepare: Put all ingredients but the black goat and the dog costume in a pot. Cover with water and let it boil indefinitely. The stench will attract the wicked neighbour to the spell. While he looks into the pot, release the black goat, that mad with the bad smell of the potion, will knock-out the wicked neighbour with a strategic horn thrust. Then, you dress him with the dog costume and take him to a veterinarian to be neutered. The results will be noticeable in a few days.

Success guaranty: 100%